DISABILITIES CHRONICLES

The atmosphere was really nice. The sky was clear and it smelled good like the sun. It seemed like even the strawberries that mom had put on the birthday cake smelled like the sun, even though everyone knew they came from the supermarket. It's such a lucky thing to have your birthday in the summer, because even if some friends have gone on vacation, we can still celebrate it outside and invite people ! This year, we decided to celebrate my birthday a little later in the evening and share the meal at the lake so not to bother the neighbours.

We were seated at a wooden table facing the lake. At these wooden picnic tables. We were at the moment of the meal after the birthday party. Everyone was at the table: my parents, my little sister, my uncle, his wife, and their children... Except for me. I was on a special chair, far from the table. I couldn't even reach my own birthday cake because it was too far away from me... To be honest, even if I had been close to the cake, I wouldn't have been able to touch it. Because a deformation of my hands and arms prevents me from grasping anything. I have no hold on anything.

Yet, it was indeed my cake on the table, a magnificent strawberry cake with heart decorations on the side. But it was mom who was feeding me so that I too could enjoy my own cake. Sometimes, the slices weren't big enough, and I would grumble a bit, and everyone would tease me: “C'mon, Louis, you aren't gonna get upset over such a little thing… You’re gonna have plenty of cake, don't worry !” they all said, smiles on their faces. I am sure it was benevolent. But they didn’t understand that it was more than just a story about cake and whipped cream, more than just a story about slices, but about the inequity of life: Why the hell had God given me a body that I could not use ?

They always say that life has a meaning, but it depends on who you’re talking about. This cake seemed to taunt me from the table, just like my friends who were playing ball and running at full speed a little earlier during my birthday party, while I couldn't take a single step, a stupid hat on my head with stars as a consolation prize. My body was a broken machine that nothing, not even the most beautiful of parties, could repair.